1 : How many fetuses are at the Fetal Institute?
More than you can count.
2 : How were the fetuses at your institute acquired?
Over the years, they were purchased or people gave them to us.
3 : Don't you think it is morally wrong or at least a little creepy to base your life's work and your whole institute on the study of fetuses?
That's preposterous. We'd like to refer you to our Mission Statement.
4 : Have you been acknowledged or accredited by any major scientific organizations?
Probably. Our vision is so singular and so direct that we don't pay heed to public opinion or man-made words like "legitimacy," "morality," or "licensing.".
5 : How did you come up with the idea for the institute?
Dr. A and Dr. B were enjoying a jar of pickles at lunch together one day and it just hit them like a bolt of lightning.
6 : Is it only human fetuses that you work with?
Definitely. At least as far as we know.
7 : Have you ever been asked to do a spread for major publications like Scientific America or Vanity Fair?
Requests like that come in daily, but we are not really about that. If you've ever held in your very own hands a jar with a little pickled fetus in there, you'd realize there's a whole lot more to this world than publicity and popularity.
8 : Where is the institute located?
Right here on our very own property. Since we started with three small science labs back in the 60's, we've grown to gargantuan proportions. We'll soon be getting our own zip code.
9 : Do Dr. A and Dr. B have children of their own?
The good doctors feel that the thousands of little "characters" at our institute are like children of their own--of course not the kind you can throw a ball around with or comfortably hug.
10 : Why did you choose the name www.coolfetus.com?
Isn't it obvious? No one can deny fetuses are cool!
11 : Do Dr. A and Dr. B need bars at the institute to keep women out? Those guys are so Cool!!!
Oh, Stop.